A Girl, A Guy, And A Tumour

Good God Where Did The Time Go?

2011-11-26T15:49:00.000-06:00

Good God it’s been forever since I’ve posted. What can I say other than for a while I didn’t know if I wanted to keep my blog open anymore. But after the last few weeks I think I need to keep it open for a while longer.
Here is an update on the last few months;
- I’m headache free
- I did my Triple Bolus test and for the most part I’m good as new. My Prolactin didn’t spike during the test.
- I’m off my day-to-day hydrocortisone but still need when my body is stressed.
- Drove out to Calgary with one of my BFF so she could do her IVF treatment and so I could meet my other BFFS daughter who was born well I was still recovering. Was lucky enough to do shopping and came home with so many new threads.
- I’m only working 16 hours a week now and it’s working for us.
- I will be taking 3 months of Birth control to see if they can get my

other glands to work right.
- I’m down 27 pounds since May 13, and people are starting to tell me they are seeing the change in my body.
- Still having to deal with family members that don’t understand the impact of infertility in my life.
- I still have not gone for my MRI yet but I know I’m tumour free

Well that is the highlights of the last few months. Hopefully I can get back into writing about my boring life.

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 4

2011-08-18T06:00:00.001-05:00

Day 4

Besides Mothers Day, what is the hardest holiday for you as an infertile?

Father's Day especially now that the Hun's brother and his wife have a child, I feel guilty that the Hun may never have a child. I also feel guilty because my Dad so badly wants grandchildren I kind of feel like a failure on father's day.

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 3

2011-08-17T06:00:00.005-05:00

Day 3

When talking to your fertile parenting friends, what is/was your favorite “perk” of childlessness to rub in their face? Sleeping in? Vacations? Hot pre-pregnancy body? Come on, confess!

Most people I know tend to avoid this with me, since I fighting a tumour. But the few people that did say that I had perks often made the comment at least you boo.bs will be perky in old age. Yeah!

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 2

2011-08-16T06:00:00.002-05:00

Day 2

Discuss the most ridiculous thing you ever heard about conception. Where did you hear it? Did it work for someone else? Did you try it?

I have heard so many these over the past 8 years, many from friends, some from family, even my Granny and her friends got in on this. Granny and her friends said to stand on my head, according to them this is what doctors once said to do, to use egg whites as a lub (my aunt's friend swears by this), to a home style "IVF" kits (website says many people have conceived their babies this way) and no I have never tried any of these.

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge

2011-08-15T11:25:00.000-05:00

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge
I saw this 30 day Infertility blog challenge on PCOS Chick's blog. I though this might be a great way for me to focus on my infertility, since most of my focus has been on my tumour up till now.

Here are the questions you will see during the next 30 days:

1.How did you and your partner decide when you were ready to start trying to conceive?
2.Discuss the most ridiculous thing you ever heard about conception. Where did you hear it? Did it work for someone else? Did you try it?
3.When talking to your fertile parenting friends, what is/was your favorite “perk” of childlessness to rub in their face? Sleeping in? Vacations? Hot pre-pregnancy body? Come on, confess!
4.Besides Mothers Day, what is the hardest holiday for you as an infertile?
5.Write a letter (one that you never have to send) to a fertile in your life. Did they hurt you? Support you? Tell them how you feel, all the things you can’t bring yourself to say in person.
6.Discuss how you found your way into the ALI community, and what being part of it has meant to you – good and bad.
7.If you had gotten pregnant that first month you started trying, how would you have been a different parent? What changes have you made to your parenting style (either current or future) in the time you spent trying to conceive?
8.Share a recipe for your favorite alcoholic drink (or, if you don’t drink, it can be non-alcoholic but make it fun!), and your favorite comfort and/or post-bfn food.
9.What was the first baby or pregnancy-related purchase you ever made? Was it before or after you started trying to conceive? Or was it after you were already pregnant? Why did you choose that particular item to buy first? If you haven’t purchased anything yet, why not?
10.Other than the song “I Would Die For That,” post a video of a song that has special meaning to you and your infertility journey. Explain it, if you’re comfortable doing so.
11.Post your favorite pre-ttc picture of yourself. Why is it your favorite? If possible, talk about that day/moment.
12.Talk about how you chose your RE.
13.Post the list of potential baby names that you seriously considered, but can no longer use because someone stole it/it became too popular/whatever reason.
14.If a very observant stranger were to walk into your house, what clues could lead them to believe that you have struggled with infertility?
15.If you are not yet pregnant/a parent: What are you MOST and LEAST looking forward to after that first beta? If you are already pregnant/a parent: What was the most pleasant/unpleasant thing about pregnancy? If you have taken the childfree path: What pregnancy symptom are you happy to have avoided, and which one do you wish you’d experienced?
16.If you are not yet a parent: What are you MOST looking forward to about parenthood? If you are a parent: What is the most surprising thing about being a parent? If you have taken the childfree path: What is the most surprising part of living childfree after infertility?
17.Tell us your funniest Clomid/Femara/Injectibles mood-swing story. If you don’t have one, tell us your funniest general infertility drug story.
18.Tell us about a pre-ttc pregnancy “scare.” With your current partner, or with an ex.
19.What tv show/movie/commercial/print ad has bothered you the most since you began trying to conceive? If possible, post it here. Tell us why it bothered you so much.
20.Have you ever bonded with someone IRL over infertility, even just for a few minutes? It could be a family member, friend, neighbor, or even the clerk at the grocery store who noticed your OPK and vitamin purchase. Tell the story.
21.What is your favorite infertility-related quote? It doesn’t have to be explicitly related to infertility, but one that means something to your personal journey.
22.Were you the product of infertility? Was anyone you know the product of infertility? How do you know? Or do you just suspect based on circumstances like age differences between siblings, time between marriage and conception, etc.
23.Does your religion (or lack of) help/hurt/affect your infertility journey? Have you found religion? Lost it? Does it affect what treatments you do?
24.How has your financial situation affected your infertility journey?
25.Talk about a time when you made someone in your life understand more about infertility.
26.What do you use the “nursery” for right now? If you already had a baby, what did you use it for before pregnancy?
27.If you had known that you would have trouble conceiving, what would you have done differently in life? If you already knew, did that knowledge affect your other life choices?
28.Have you ever done something “non-traditional” in order to help you conceive?
29.Tell us about a friendship you lost or a relationship that changed for the worse because of infertility.
30.After a month of infertility talk, we need a distraction. Give us a link to one of your favorite non-infertility-sites, or tell us about your favorite distraction activity/book/feel-good movie.

DAY 1

How did you and your partner decide when you were ready to start trying to conceive?

While we were dating we talked up kids, we both wanted a dozen (no we are not crazy) so we never really had a chat about this other than we would let nature take it's course. So in 10 years of marriage we never had a talk about starting.

Poka Dots and Doctors

2011-08-08T00:08:00.000-05:00

It’s been a month since I’ve posted! Where did the time go? So much has happened in the last 4 weeks. We moved, I had my 8 week checked up with both my Neurosurgeon, and my new Endo, and I add a new doctor to my list; a neurologist.

First the move, we took a month to move. We moved from a small 400 square foot place to a place that is about 900 square feet. We now have a balcony, dining area, a second bedroom, bigger living room and laundry room. It’s funny I have started decorating because it feels like a condo. Bathroom is grey, blue and tanned. I have a lovely photo of the ocean and a mountain at sunrise in there (it reminds me of BC). Kitchen is being done in Chefs and wine (I believe it is Ha.ute. Cuisi.nes by Jen.nifer Gar.net), my accent colors are red, orange and well white. The dining room area is going to continual with the wine theme. I have two ideals for this area and not sure which on to do. A couple of years back I designed a wine label for my FIL and I was thinking of making this the art work. Or doing a part of a saying my Dad always said and just putting up pictures of wine and food. I’m leaning towards the wine label, since the Hun’s grandfather worked for a wine company making barrels. It would bring the Hun`s Hungarian roots in to our home. Living room is inspired by some art work I bought Granny when I lived in England (I`m not sure how to display them). Bedroom is still up in the air, I`m waiting because the Hun is going to Winnipeg in a month to see this Grandma and his mom is an artist, her media is mostly oil. He is hoping to find something in her paintings. If nothing is there that I like I will be using a photo I took many moons ago when I thought I might become a photographers. It`s very peaceful photo of the pond at the Capil.ano Bri.dge in BC. So that what is keeping me so busy. I even decorated the laundry room, actually it was the first room I did, I did it in polka dots, I wanted something fun, since only work is done in that room.

Now on to the 8 week check up. I saw the neurosurgeon and I`m still not officially consider tumour free. I will have to wait to September for that when I have my next MRI. At that point I should be released from his care. He thinks the pain and pressure I`m having is cause to a drainage problem, he hopes it will clear up in 3 months. To help it along I started going for lymph node massage. My pathology report came back and I had a non cancerous, prolactin producing tumour.
I no longer see the Endo that told me I would die if I did the surgery (Amen for that). I know see the only other one in town. My new doctor is really nice and up front. She seemed surprised that I had wait 9 years for the surgery. She is worried about my weight and the Hun`s weight. She gave me my levels and my prolactin is still at 2.7. However my Estradiol is only 69 ( so right now babies are still out) and my Vitamin D is 23. So I need more blood work. I`m still on the thyroid meds (I actually feel better on them), Desmopressin and Hydro cortisone. But I going to start lowering the dose on the Hydro and hope it will go well.

I started seeing a neurologist to see why my toe, finger and now heel has gone numb. While there I learned that my left side is really weak, and that my optic never is crushed, it explains the loss of my eye sight, something they could not see with the tumour in place. As to why I`m have parts going numb that is anyone guess, I`m being test for everything from blood disorders to vitamin B12. If you have any suggestion about why my body parts are going numb and staying numb please share them.
Well that`s been my month, boring as normal.

I Remeber What I was Doing 10 Years Ago Today!

2011-07-06T06:50:00.000-05:00

So in between recovery and moving, the Hun and I are celebrating our 10 Wedding Anniversary to day! So Happy 10th Hun, and remember to lift with you legs as you are moving those boxes! Here is to many more. I love you Attila!

What I have been Up to This Past Week

2011-07-04T16:25:00.000-05:00

Last Tuesday marked my first day back to work. My husband, co-workers and I couldn’t believe how fast the six weeks went by. I have to admit at moments I really missed the girls and guys I work with and at other moments I didn’t know if I could go back yet. I also have to say I was a little scared going back. I was nervous that my morning crew would not need me anymore and I would be out of a job. But to great relief my guys are happy to have me back. Lifting and bending over makes me feel like my brain is oozing out of my nose, let me tell it is not a fun feeling.
I will be seeing my doctors on the 14 of July and I will be talking about this. On the 14 I will also seeing my Endo, since my body seems to be losing weight I’m now going to be again to go back on the metformin to see if it helps now. I have lost more weight since the hospital, but not as much as I had hoped. I had hoped to lose 20lbs by now but have only lost 16lbs. I have to say I see the changes in my body and I’m having no more headaches. On the medical front I’m very hopeful that my doctors will be happy with my recovery.

Now on to the personal side of life. We are moving to a bigger place, right now our place is about 400 square feet with two adults, two cats and all our crap it’s really tiny. The place we are moving to is 1000 square feet. It has a dishwasher, in suite washer and dryer and a balcony; it feels like a condo. As much work as it is to move we really can’t wait to move, we pick up the keys tomorrow.

one month

2011-06-13T10:04:00.000-05:00

Today marks one official month since my surgery.

I’ve wanted to write before but never could find the right words. Part of me feels I wanted/need to move on from this blog and this part of my life and the other part of me is just unsure of how to put all that happen down.

I should say life is getting good. For the first time in years I feel normal, I don’t have any headaches, the unexplained body pain in gone, and I’m losing weight very slowly. However my nose is still very sore from the surgery.

First post

2011-05-22T14:43:00.000-05:00

I had every attentions of posting on the 13 before we left for the hospital, but just never got to it.

I guess I should start with what I’m up to right now.

I’ve been at home almost 48 hours.

I’m for the moment what the neurosurgeon called tumour free!!! The First time in 9 years.

My proclatin level is down to 1.7 (It was 482.5)

I have the next 6 weeks or so off work to recovery.

The Hun is off this week to take care of me.

I’ve course lost some of my boo.bies

And I’ve lost some weight already

And life will be an adjustment…

2 days

2011-05-11T10:44:00.000-05:00

As of right now I have not been bumped from Friday the 13th. So if all goes well I will be having my stealth MRI tomorrow afternoon. Then surgery on Friday. My surgery is schedule for noon on Friday so we have to leave for the hospital by 9:30. But in the mean time, I have to clean my house, go do something fun with Bec, have a date night with the Hun and have a few panic attacks.

So I'm off to clean

3 1/2 more days

2011-05-09T23:05:00.000-05:00

Since today is almost over,it means I have 3 days left to the big day.

Bumped to Friday May 13

2011-05-05T22:30:00.000-05:00

I found out a couples of days ago my surgery got bumped. Thankfully my wait will not be to long, as I was lucky to get in on Friday May 13( only 4 days more of waiting). Yeah that is right Friday the 13 will be my day, unless I', bumped again.

If I'm bumped again I have decide I'll be going to the Minister of Health both here in the province and in Ottawa. I've decide that I'm sick of dealing with doctors who's attitude is that my fertility is not important, or as important as other health issues. Beside they impacted that not having a period has on a woman's body, I have a family history of reproductive cancer on my mom's side of the family. I feel if this surgery doesn't happen soon, I will be facing the battle that my Great-Granny, her sister and my Aunt has faced.

Is it me or are doctors less likely to care about a female reproductive health?

8 days...

2011-05-01T19:00:00.000-05:00

I have to say the days are flying by. I have one more days of work left and 8 days until surgery. Tomorrow I have I go to my pre-admission clinic and then next Sunday I have my stealth MRI.

Today was filled with a nice surprise and a relaxing day with the Hun, since the roads were closed due a snow storm. This morning the Hun surprised me by taking me out to brunch at a very Fancy hotel here in town. It was a nice change and wonderful date.

I plan to fill this week with cleaning, relaxing, a date or two with the Hun and time hanging out with friends. I think this week will go even faster than the last 5 weeks.
So hopefully I can get my to-do list done.

Endoscopic Pituitary Surgery

2011-04-19T23:47:00.001-05:00

20 days to this...

30 days or 720 hours whatever comes first

2011-04-09T06:42:00.000-05:00

In 30 days or in 720 hours from now I will hopefully be tumour free.

Let The Count Down Began

2011-03-24T18:39:00.000-05:00

At 10:30 today I had both the neurosurgeon and the ENT surgeon booked but no operating room. It was not looking good for surgery to happen anytime soon. There was a chance that I would have to wait to summer if not fall. I have to say I was feeling as this surgery might never happen.

Than at 3 the neurosurgeon’s nurse called back to say she found me an operating room. So I’m officially booked for surgery, One Day after Mother’s Day, May 9. So in six weeks and 1 day I will hopefully be tumour free.

Still Waiting. 4 a Date

2011-02-23T08:27:00.000-06:00

Still waiting.

Minmum of 3 weeks notice seems to be the way they are booking.

2011-02-02T18:57:00.000-06:00

I read a lot of infertility blogs, and a common theme that runs through these blogs is the anxiety that comes from the 2 week wait. If you don’t know what a 2 week wait ( 2ww)is; it’s the time you need to wait to pee on a pregnancy test after IUI, IVF, or just plain old fashion Se.X . I have to say I have never known this 2ww anxiety that is until now. Instead of a 2ww, I have a 3 month wait(or longer).
Well today marks two months since my appointment with the neurosurgeon and I still have no date. Hopefully I will get a date soon, because I have to say I’m having the same anxiety that an IVF patients has in her 2 week wait, just my wait is a lot longer than 14 days.

January-17-11, Blue Monday epescially if you are my kitten

2011-01-17T13:47:00.000-06:00

Happy Blue Monday! Hope you are not having the most depressing day of the year.

For my little Kitten, Rika I'm sure she is having a blue Monday. I dropped her off at this morning at the vets so she could be spayed. I choose to have it done just before she turned 6 months so we didn't have to listen to those "come and get it cat calls". But with that being said I have to admitted I feel guilty about it. As crazy as that sounds I feel for her. I wonder if she will feel any less of a female now that she lost her girlie parts? I wonder if I'm causing her hurt by doing this? I know truly it is for the best since there are so many kittens and cats that need homes, and we don't want to add to the problem, but this is a what goes through this infertile girl's brain.

Right now I'm waiting for the vet to call to tell me how she did and when I can pick her up tomorrow.

2011 = Hope

2011-01-01T21:06:00.000-06:00

As we remove one calendar replace it with a new one, I always feel hopeful.

How can you not when you have a new slat to write a new story of another year. I have always loved the New Years and the feeling I get from the unknown.

As this year begins I’m filled with even more hope and anticipation for the upcoming months. For once that I maybe closer to my dream of having a child rather than a tumour.

So all I can do is wish you and yours all the best in 2011, because I feel 2011 will be our best year yet.

Can't Stop

2010-12-12T17:13:00.000-06:00

When I was told that surgery more than likely would restore my fertility, I had a hard time believing in it at that moment. I’ve spend so many years knowing that children were not possible for us as long as I had my tumour, it was hard to believe that in 3 months I could have my fertility back.

Over the past couple of days I’ve been thinking more and more about what next Christmas might be like for us. This is dangerous for someone with fertility issues. I can't stop thinking that I could be pregnant by next Christmas; I could have a baby in 2012.

Then there is part of me that say stop, realize that this surgery may not work, you may never get the chance to be pregnant, fertility may be restores. I had been slow coming to terms with that and I hope that if the surgery doesn’t work I can still be okay about all this.

Besides getting my hopes up about a baby, I’m getting my hopes up that removing this tumour will help me loose the weight I have put on because of the imbalance of the hormones.

So for the next 12 weeks or so I’m going to try not to think about the future, babies, or a skinner me. I’m just going to focus on getting to surgery day.

I Would Like To Offer You Surgery.

2010-12-05T23:44:00.001-06:00

Those are the best words I have ever heard. I actually thought I would never hear those words. Like most people with a Pituitary Tumour it has been a long hard road that has taken years.

Before I heard those words I had to give Dr. F the Coles notes of my last 8 years. I had to share details of test, the impact on our marriage, the medication and their side effects. I lead him through the past few years since we moved to toontown. I shared with him the doctors and each theory/ diagnoses that I have been given. I shared with him the side/ risk I knew about the surgery.

Then he asked about a wish list of symptoms I would like to be rid of. I was like all of them, but he made me pick the top three. First on my list was fertility restored, than weight loss, and to be rid of the headaches.

Dr. F was straightforward he said he believes he could restore my fertility, my weight loss morethan likely would be easier once the tumour was gone, but the headaches may never go away or they could even be worst.

Dr. F went on to talk about the risks, to talk about the possible of blindness, stork, coma and death. He also talked about the fact I may never be rid of all the abnormal cells. He talked about the process and why most people don’t get surgery for my type of tumour. We talked about the risks, and the numbers, The Hun asked questions. We talked about the surgery and it can last anywhere from 1 and 30 mins to 4 hours. He then spoke those words we have waited so long to hear; I would like to offer you surgery.

The Hun thought I was going to kiss him. I was like yes. I could have kissed and I could cried tears of joy.

We went on to talk about my hospital stay and the wait time for the surgery, we thought it would be a minimum of six months, but instead where told that it would be more like 3 months.

3 months...
This means I should be having surgery in March 2011.

I was shocked. The Hun was shocked. Dr. F had me sign the consent forms. And before I left the hospital I was on my blackberry facebooking the results of the appointment and texting my friends with my wonderful news.

Finally News We Want To Hear.

2010-12-02T11:49:00.000-06:00

We meet with the neurosurgeon this morning and I’m being booked for surgery. I should be in within a few months. I finally feel like we are moving on. My neurosurgeon believes that my fertility will be restored. I will write after we celebrate.

2010-11-18T23:55:00.002-06:00

In between celebrating that 11 years ago tonight the Hun and I had our first date, having our backs adjusted and dealing with the full force of old man winter, I received a letter from the Neurosurgeon.

I have been given an appointment date!

I’ve been waiting to see an neurosurgeon for so long, before I opened the letter I thought for sure it would have been like another 6 months of waiting. But instead it stated Dec 2, Two weeks from today!!!! I know there is a chance (a big chance) that Neurosurgeon will not want to do the surgery. Pituitary tumour surgery in Canada is still not that common. And like any surgery there are risks, and they do include death. However I feel I need to do it. I need to have this tumour gone! I need to feel like I’m moving on with our lives.
Hopefully 2011 will be my year!

In Less Than 24 Hours... Grey will Still Matter

2010-10-31T02:15:00.002-05:00

In less than 24 hours Halloween, October, and Brain Tumour Awareness month will be over.

Most people don’t know that October is Brain Tumour Awareness month since so much media coverage is giving to the “Think Pink” campaign that also is also running in October. This is personal my pet peeve for me.

I think it is my pet peeve since so many more women die of other diseases in Canada other then Breast Cancer. The top 3 causes of death for Canadian women (back in 1999) are as follows; Circulatory system diseases, Cancer, not including breast cancer, and Respiratory system diseases. Breast Cancer is actually listed as the 4th leading cause of death of Canadian women on the above list. You can look at the link here. I tried finding a similar link with newer data but couldn’t.

I’m not mocking breast cancer but I have an issue with the way companies are on the “think pink” band wagon. I mean I would love to see companies market items for lung cancer or ovarian cancer awareness. I would personally love to buy a Grey mix master if I knew that Kitchenaid was donating money from its sell to Brain Tumour research. I would also love to see companies’ market items and give there processes for infertility researcher.

I personally feel that one of the reasons why Brain Tumours Awareness month is not given so much media attention is because it doesn’t have a catchy slogan like;” Think Pink” or “Save the TaTas”.

I feel that Brain Tumour Associations need to unite and hire a good PR firm and start a slogan campaign.

My slogan suggestion is; Grey Matters! And it does matter to the estimates 55,000 Canadians that are living with a Brain Tumour and to the other 10,000 will be diagnosed this year.

Book: UnSung Lullabies

2010-10-25T22:06:00.000-05:00

I ordered this book and now I’m waiting for this book to arrive. Hopefully it will come this week.

Over the past few months and more so over the past few weeks I've been feeling so uncertain if I can keep fighting my tumour and my infertility.

My tumour is the root cause of my infertility and many of my other health issues. I've been fighting this so long and it's taken it's tow on my body, emotion, mental health, friendships and relationships and my marriage. I'm sure the Hun will say that my tumour is the root cause of all issues between us. As I wait for an appointment with the Neurosurgeon I feel I need to prepare for the possibility that the neurosurgeon will say that surgery is either to dangerous or not a possible due to size or location of the tumour.

As I think about living childfree, maybe this is a way to go. Then I see a baby and I have that pulls on my heart string. Than I back to were I started at.

See You In September, Oops I should have said October.

2010-10-17T23:36:00.000-05:00

I know it’s not September and October is more than half and this is my first post. But I feel it’s time to come back and blog now.

Here is a brief rundown of my September.
We had to said good bye to this sweet face.

GG April 12, 2001 - August 31, 2010

I leaned to change the struts on my car.
I was given the gift of this little one.

Rika

I celebrate my 32nd birthday.
Rika and I bummed bummed a ride to Calgary to visit friend. Rika was more than happy to get home.

That was my September!

And October has been a slower month.
I have been sick with a cold that will not go away.
I meet my ENT specialist, and he has agreed to be my ENT if the neurosurgeon agrees to surgery.
I found out that the lumps I worried about were actual abscesses caused by an infected tonsil tag.
I have a date for my MRI (next Sunday) and I’m still waiting for the date to meet my neurosurgeon.

I’ve learned that 24% of my cousin (or their wives) are going to have a baby by spring of 2011. I’m starting to hate talking to my Grandmas since all I hear about is the pregnant women and the new babies. I’m not sure they understand how hard all that is for me. I’m seriously considering cutting of my families so I don’t have to hear how great my cousins are. I know my Grandmas don’t mean to hurt me but most of the time when I get off the phone with them I end up crying for days.

I’m considering getting a couple of books about living childless after infertility, because at this point that how I see our life going. I feel we’ve been fighting with Doctors for so long and I’m not sure I can fight again or move to another province if I can surgery here. I feel like everyone else is moving on the road to having a family and I’m stuck in last place. I feel like I’m being left out of life because of this and I think I need to figure out how to live childless and be happy with it.

I'm back and I'm trying to figure out life with my tumour and what the future holds for the Hun and I.

October is Brain Tumour Awareness Month

2010-10-04T01:14:00.002-05:00

See You In September

2010-08-10T12:24:00.000-05:00

Since I've been a bad blogger this month, I've decided to make this my vacation month. See you in September.

The Recap Of A Roadtrip

2010-07-28T14:35:00.001-05:00

Well I’ve been trying to write this blog post since I got back from our midsummer road trip on Monday night but I just can’t seem to write what I want too.

I should say first off that the guilt and worry that I felt before we left was for nothing. Everything was fine at home and my medication was not a big deal, then again I only took my pain medication and tumour meds so I went from about 18 pills a day to about 9. I’ve slowly started to added back the other 9 pills now.

The trip itself was filled with wonderful people and great food (like all road trips should be). I got to meet most my friend Becky’s family and spend some time with her very cute niece and nephew. Becky’s parents and family made me feel welcome and included me as a family member. Even her brother’s dog Hoochie made me feel loved; I don’t think my face has ever been that clean before. While with Becky’s family we were lucky enough to be included in one of their family picnic. And I have to say that was a treat. Becky’s Auntie M, made this wonderful beef pull-part sandwich meat and her Mom made this magnificent Rhubarb-Saskatoon berry crisp. It’s amazing how I always base my rating on a trip on the food I’ve eaten!! Am I the only one to do this?

After leaving Becky’s family we head up to Regina to have a look at the Our Body: The Universe Within exhibit at the Saskatchewan Science center. It was a neat way to see our bodies. I was a little worried that I might be grossed out but have to say that it is well done and not gross at all. It is worth seeing, IMO. I was a little sad that they didn’t have more on the endocrinology system in this exhibit, but then again I feel the same way every time I pick up a book about hormones and see that prolactin is only one paragraph or not mention at all.

So all in all the trip was great, I came back feeling refreshed and rested. I also came home with more knowledge then when I left, and I have to say that is a good thing. So all in all I leaned a little more about my friend, seen some more of Saskatchewan, was loved by Hoochie, ate some superior food and saw the inner workings of the human body up close.

Wordless Wednesday - Our Reason For Our Road Trip.

2010-07-28T13:32:00.000-05:00

A Midsummer Road Trip with Guilt and Worry

2010-07-24T13:17:00.001-05:00

In a few short hours I’m leaving on a road trip with one of my BFFs, Becky. We will be home Monday night. It’s just a short midsummer girl’s trip. It should be fun. The Hun is worried that we may get a little crazy. But I’ve assured him that we won’t come back with an extra holes or tattoos. As much fun as I know I will have I’m feeling a little guilty and worried.

Guilt: I’m feeling guilty. I feel like a bad mom because I’m leaving my GG. Yes, GG is still with us and most days she is still my very lovable kitty baby. However there are days when she is my little old lady. I knew she will be fine, but I still have guilt. The Hun assures me that everything will be fine. And I trust him to take care of my baby girl and her sister.

Now for the worry;
I’ve never traveled before with all the new medication. People know I have a tumour and but living with all the medication are too different things. I’m always a little worried that people will see the real face of my illness and will run the other way. Heck for years I was worried the Hun would run so why wouldn’t I worry about a friend not wanting any part of this.

I’m looking forward to this trip. I’m trying to push the guilt and worry aside and get excited about this trip.

I need to have fun on this trip.

I will have fun on this trip first I need to get over the guilt and worry.

Wordless Wednesday - My New Enemy

2010-07-14T12:50:00.000-05:00

And The Winner is... UPDATED

2010-07-14T08:43:00.002-05:00

Congratulation to RGK.

RGK if you could email your address I'll get the prize pack in the mail to you this week.

She Picked Door Number 1

2010-07-12T13:05:00.000-05:00

I'm happy to report that Dr.A, picked the right door! She picked Door # 1!!! :) My file is going to the neurosurgery department. I’m going for another MRI while I wait for my Neurosurgery appointment. MRI within 3months, and Neurosurgery appointment (fingers crossed) within 5 months.

Dr. A stressed to us that there is no grantee that the Neurosurgeon will do my surgery, but she feels it’s the next step too. So now we wait.

Just as a side note, Dr. A thinks the March’s prolactin reading of 42 was an error too. So that means my prolactin level has never been under 100.

The Card Simple Reads

2010-07-11T17:31:00.000-05:00

The card in the flowers simple reads: Debbs, thank you for your help - D

What you write when someone may have saved your life. It’s hard to believe that it was less than a week since; I came home from getting grocery to find a man doing a yoga like pose on the grass in front of my apartment building. I waited in my car a few minutes to see what was going on, a girl can be too careful. When I got out of my car I walked towards him in hope that he was just looking for mushrooms. As I approached him I could see something was wrong. I could see the sweat pouring from him. He was pale and having a hard time breathing. I offered him water and sat and talked to him for a few minutes, he turned blue, as if he had frost bite, that’s when I knew that he need more help than a glass of water.

I called 911 and within 5 minutes I had EMT and the fire trucks here. I sat and watched as they worked on him. After they got him in the ambulance, I talked to the firemen and told them that I had told the man that I would keep his bike until he could pick it up. I locked up his bike and hoped that he would be back for it.

All week I’ve waited for a phone call, waited for this unknown man to return for his bike. Then today the phone rang and it was him. He had spent all these days in the hospital and he wanted to pick up his bike. I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to here a stranger’s voice.

He arrived with his son; his son couldn’t thank me enough. According to his son more than likely saved his life. The Doctors found heart and lungs damaged, and are not sure what exactly caused it and this episode. They are sure of one thing that if he had not gotten help when he did he would have been worst off.

As they left with his bike I wished him and well and opened the flowers that he gave to me. They’re my favorite color for a rose.

Behind Door Number???

2010-07-11T11:49:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow we will meet with Dr.A (Endo) again. My six month of Norprolac is up, and my prolactin numbers are still well above the normal. The lowest my prolactin level has been measured at, was back in March, it was 42, the Hun and I believe that this was a lab error.

I’ve know about this appointment for about two months now and have to say I’ve tried to push it out of my mind, that was until about a month ago. That’s when I started thinking about what may happen in this meeting and the outcomes of it. I find myself getting a little worried about what may happen, it’s kind of choosing an unseen prize from behind closed doors on a game show, you may win what you want, like a new car or you may get a useless prize, like a life time of rice.

My file gets sent to a Neurosurgeon here in town, and I have my tumour removed. (This is my choice.)

I’m asked to take Norprolac for another six month. (I’m sure this is Dr. A choice, not an option in our minds)

I stop taking all medication and live with the tumour and its side effects. (This maybe something Dr. A suggests)

I stop seeing Dr. A and go to a Naturopath doctor here and see if they can help shrink the tumour and restore my hormones. (If Dr. A doesn’t live up to our six month deal this is the option the Hun is choosing)

Become a medial tourist and go to India to have my tumour removed. (Truly I like to think this is an option and it maybe one day, but right now the price tag is what is holding it as a last option.)

So that’s it one more day of being on pins and needles and then I guess I see what door Dr. A picks for me, while us, since the Hun is in this as much as I’m. If I like the door I will keep the prize and if not I will try and pick another door and see how that works out. So tomorrow we either be celebrating that we are moving ahead with surgery or we will be going out to dinner for a pick me up. Either way I’m sure you all will hear about it.

Wordless Wednesday - Rain Rain Go Away, Come Again in 4 days...

2010-07-07T09:10:00.000-05:00

For Better, For Worst, For Richer, For Poor, In Sickness And In Health

2010-07-06T06:00:00.016-05:00

It’s hard to believe that it was 9 years ago, today that I stood before my in-laws, parents and my beloved Granny and said those same words(in some form) that all married couple have said to each other

“I, take you, to be my lawful wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.”

I’m not sure where the time has gone since that day. All I know is over the past nine years we have lost dreams but also found adventurers. We have fought against each other and stood up for one another. We have followed each other down dead end paths and to new places. We have laughed so hard that we have cried together. We have waited and wonder just to find that we each had part of the answer. We have talked without thinking and listened when needed. We’ve have filled each other hearts with love and caused each other to worry. And in it all we have made memories to last a life time and yet still have a life time of memories to make.

Happy Anniversary my Hun! Love You.

Just Another Manic Monday

2010-07-05T22:27:00.000-05:00

It's just another manic Monday
I wish it was Sunday
'Cause that's my fun-day – The Bangles

Well not for me. I never wish it was Sunday, because I love Mondays. Mondays are always a new beginning, a chance to make change, not! See I never know what my Mondays will hold anymore, since I meet my dear friend Beckie my Monday are filled with some sort of project or purpose. About a month ago we paint her bathroom, sometimes my Mondays are just filled with shopping and just good old plain girl time. Or like today when it involved getting some new art for Beckie.

Beckie is one of those people who makes my life interesting and my husband shake his head. The " Body Art" session last less than 5 minutes but will be something she will have for life. Beckie had said " wanted this to remind all that she has gone through and will go through ( well trying to have her children)!!!" So here is what Beckie's new art looks like.

So there it is Beckie's body art and how I avoid today just being another Manic Monday.

(For my family and friends that don't know what it is, it's a red thread the symbol of infertility. Sorry the quality is not better but I took the photos with my black.berry.)

Going For the Golden Prize

2010-07-01T22:41:00.000-05:00

After much talking, my friend Becky and I finally joined the gym 10 days ago , it is actually the local Y-M-C-A . We both have our reason(s) for joining the gym but the biggest reason is the same for both of us. We hope that working out and getting ourselves healthier will bring us closer to the golden prize- a baby or two.

I’ve been able to go almost every day this week which is nice, since I didn’t know if I would be able to pull off working out every day. I find that if I do it in the morning my days seem to go better!

One our first day at the Y, Beck introduce me to her favorite machine, AMT® 100i or AKA the gauntlet. It is now my favorite machine. With this machine you seem to burn more calories than with any machine that I’ve ever used. I’ve used this machine just about every day. After sweating my/our a$$ off on the gauntlet we normal head to the pool for a few laps and 10 minutes of treading water. Then on off days we are planning to do aquatic fitness with all the old ladies.

We are hoping to work 7 days a week. Here is hoping we keep up with it and we both see results by the end of summer.

Wordless Wednesday - Soon To Be 143 Years Old

2010-06-30T09:22:00.000-05:00

My Sister From Another Mister Give Away

2010-06-18T17:46:00.000-05:00

On Sunday and Monday of this week I was lucky enough to have my BFF, Bethie and her sweet husband, D drive to toontown to visit me, ok us. Having her here made me realize how much I miss her in my day to day life. It's hard to believe that we have been friends for 8 years now, where has the time gone.

We meet when we both were hired as billing clerks for a furniture company. I knew right away that we would be friends; I never knew that we would be BFF, or as Bethie calls me; her sister from another mister. Bethie is everything I'm not and I think that’s why I love her so much.

About a year after we meet I found out that I had my tumour, Bethie was the first person I told (the Hun had been told my Doc); I remember the moment like it happen just yesterday. I told her the doctor told us that having children would not be easy and more than likely I would never have any. With hearing this news Bethie without any reservation offered to be our surrogate mother. We have never taken her up on that offer but the offer means more to me than anything.

A little while back Bethie called to tell me her great news that they would soon start trying for their own children. I was touched that she felt the need to tell me that they were soon starting. I hope that everything goes easy for them; I don’t want her life touched by infertility!!! When she came to town I gave her a book in hopes that it would answer so many of the questions I’m sure she has.

So in honor of my “sister from another mister” (and possible of her soon to be little ones) I’m doing a giveaway of books and Alba items. The books are Enhancing Fertility, What to Except before You’re Excepting and The couples Guide to In Vitro Fertilization. These are for you to share with your BFF or for you to keep and I’m also including some wonderful smelling Alba products.

Here is how to enter:

1.Become a follower of my blog ( A Girl, A Guy and A tumour)! (1 Entry)

2. Post a comment about why you best friend is your best friend, what makes her special.

3. For an extra 5 entries post something positive about your BFF and this giveaway on your blog. Let me know you have done this so I can keep track of all your extra entries!

If you already follower of my blog just complete step #2 and if you want the extra entries step #3 and that's it.

I will be picking a winner on July 6, 2010.

May's Prolactin Level

2010-06-14T23:22:00.002-05:00

230!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Review of Day 1 And a Product review

2010-06-03T10:10:00.000-05:00

So yesterday I started this Vega diet. I have to say that day one went well. I managed to drink my Vega 3 times; I also drank 8 glass of water. For snacks I eat the very yummy (and very, very addictive) Greek God Yogurt and an Energy Bar. But then it went downhill when I went out to dinner with my friend, we went for Greek food, I had a pork souvlaki wrap and a Greek salad and a sugar free drink. It could have been worst.

Yesterday, I was at the organic market where I found a Pomegran & Cherry energy bar by Nature’s Path. I have to say this is one of the best energy bars I’ve ever tasted. Well eating this bar I kept thinking this taste just like a cherry cobbler. The healthy taste of all the good things in this bar is hiding by the sweetness of the cherries and the drizzle of icing sugar(or what looks like icing sugar)on the top. These bars are under $2.00/bar. I will be picking up more of these bars. Nature's Path Organic Optimum Energy Pomegran Cherry I would say is 4 out of 5 stars. I'll be buying more of these tasty bars.

Well that was day 1 and day 2 is starting out good. But I have to run to go defrost my upright freezer.

My New Diet Plan And This is Day 1

2010-06-02T11:29:00.003-05:00

I need to start losing weight again. Over the last year I’ve lost 20lbs, not much but for me it’s good. So yesterday I decide to do one week of Vega.

My plan is to drink Vega (mixed with chocolate Almond Milk) 3 times a day for 7 days and snack on fruits & vegs, nuts and of course my new favourite food, Greek yogurt. And of course I will also be drinking 8 glass of water per day.

I’m going to try and be vegetarian, and carb free (or at least a lower amount of carbs) this week. Maybe I’m crazy and I’m sure the Hun will call me this ( don’t worry Hun you don’t have to do this), but I want to see how my body reacts to this change.

Right now my scale is telling me that I weight 242 lbs. I’m hoping that I can do this and I’m hoping that I could lose a few pounds. So I wonder what my scale will tell me in one week?

2010-06-01T16:59:00.001-05:00

This week the Hun is out of town, so the cats and I are own our own. It’s been a long time since the Hun has been away and I’ve been on my own. I’m enjoying this alone time. I have a jammed pack week filled, and okay maybe it’s not jammed pack, but filled with things I never get done with the Hun at home.

On the tumour front I did my monthly blood test yesterday, so I should hear from my Endo this week. When she calls I will tell her about the lack of Norprolac in this country, and talk to her about moving my name to the surgery list.

The Way To A Man’s Heart Is Through His Stomach

2010-05-28T00:34:00.000-05:00

They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach! This is how I got my husband, I think he fell in love with me the first time I cooked dinner for him and his roommates. Hard to believe that was almost 11 years ago.

I knew that my dear Hun came with a weird plate and for the most part I can eat what he eats. I mean I can eat the Hungarian stuffed peppers, the picked green tomatoes, the sausages (Liver and all the other types) and of course the cakes. But the one thing I can’t eat is Vinetta (padlizsán kré. For those of you not Hungarian (or married to one) it is mashed eggplants. It’s a Baba Ganoush of sorts.

Tonight as a treat tonight I made the Hun a big bowl of Vinetta. It’s an easy dish, a little time consuming but not hard. This is the first time I made it and the Hun said it was great. I made a big bowl of it, he will have more for a few days! I think for the next few days I will have a special space next to his stomach.

Doctors, Doctors and more Doctors

2010-05-19T22:28:00.000-05:00

My family doctor's nurse called today, of course she had to call while I was out. When my family doctor's nurse calls it is never a good thing.

She left a message for me to call her as soon as I got the message. When I called the clinic, I had to talk to another doctor's nurse. The other nurse said that my family doctor need to see Friday. She said the blood work for my throat problem was finely ( apparently it had been lost) back and she needed to talk to me about it. So on Friday a 2:00 I will fined out what my blood test say. Hopefully she will call and see she my CT Scan has not been done yet.

On the tumour front, the pharmacy still can't get in my meds. I have to say I'm doing the happy dance, since this medication is not working for me either. I have not told Dr. A yet, I'm holding off since I'm not in the mood to talk to her since her screw up with my medication.

So While I Was Out The Docotor Called

2010-05-18T08:38:00.000-05:00

So while I was out yesterday the Dr. A called back. Apparently from the little bite of the message I could hear off my answering machine, the 450 (micro) milligrams of Norprolac I was given the prescription for this month was a mistake. According to the Doc, she had thought I was on 300, when actually I was on only 150.

On a fun note, yesterday I was busy with my garden!!! This is our first garden and here in Toontown everyone is busy planting and watching their garden grow. I will post photos of my barren prairie plot of land.

Yesterday I also was lucky enough to move into future. I lost my cell phone sometime last week and the Hun bought me a new replace phone yesterday. Well it's not just a phone it's a cra.ckberry. It is such a step up for me. I'm sure I will love it once I get use to it, but in the mean time it's adding to my stress level. Don't you just love new toys?

I Called and I'm Happy That I Got To Leave A Voice Mail ( Beacuse I'm Chicken)

2010-05-17T11:30:00.000-05:00

I finally got up the never to call my Endo's office. I'm not sure why but all weekend every time I thought about calling Dr. A’s Office I end up with that feeling of a knot in my stomach.

I’ve to say I was thankful that her nurse was away from the phone, so I got to leave a voice mail. I left all the details on the message hoping that the doctor will call me back. I actually hope the doctor will just move me to surgery, since the Norprolac is not working for me. I'm not sure why but I feel even with all the danger and risk to having my tumour removed I still feel that having it removed is my best chance of having a baby. I don't know I feel this way but I do.

After 7 years I'm ready to know for sure what my body will and will not do. Let's face it right now my body is producing eggs, no A/F, lots of Prolactin, some female hormones, no growth hormones and way too many lumps and bumps. If they end up taking away my fertility then I know we will be childless unless we do IVF. Or if the surgery works out the way I want it to then hopefully we can have a baby the old fashion way. I guess you can say that really I'm just tired of living in limbo.

I know I need to be proactive now, I can’t let these doctors make choices, I had thought I had been pro active up till now but now I feel I need to crack it up and start looking at other ways to “heal” myself if I can’t have surgery. The Hun and I have been talking about me going to see this wonderful natural path that works in the city, and I’m ready to give him a try! I’m also looking at lymphatic massage to help with this weight/puffiness that my mid section has since I started getting sick.
So that is where I stand a message left, a lower dose of Norprolac, and looking at other option for my health care.

Tomorrow

2010-05-16T16:25:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow...

I'm calling my Dr.A,(my Endo) and I'm telling her my body has hit the wall with the Norprolac. I spend a few days’ real sick and then decided to stop the higher does. I tried to call last week but she and her nurse was on holidays.

I'm hoping my doctor will understand.

I'm hoping she will move me to surgery sooner since my body can't hand these medications, as a side note I should say I might not be able to keep taking this pill much longer since my pharmacy can't get them in.

If she will not move me to surgery, the Hun and I decided I will try alternative medicine. I’m ready to move forward and if “western” medicine will not do that, I will try something else. 7 years of waiting and medication that has not work is more than enough. I’m hoping the next few months will be easy.

I really hope that the sun will come out tomorrow.

How I spent my Mother’s Day

2010-05-12T03:35:00.001-05:00

For most people Mother’s Day is a wonderful day, a day to celebrate Mothers, Grandmas, Aunts, and even yourself if you’re a Mother. I once celebrated it with all the fanfare that Hallmark wants you to have. But what happens if you are none of these things. What happens if you can’t have children or you are like me and have no nieces or nephews? What do you do?

Well for the first years of life with my tumour I celebrate it with always the hope that next year I would be a mom. Then for a couple of years the Hun would take me out for dinner to celebrate that I was woman and a good mom to my kitty girls (this include a trip to Hooters in Calgary) Now we don’t do anything, to tell you the truth the last few years I have end up in bed, crying and hiding from the hallmark commercials. I could barely mustard up the strength to call my Mom and Grandmas.

However this year was different I didn’t hide from the day; I took it back with a group of other women that are having infertility issues too. It was 3-1/2 hours of laughing at the fact that we are going things we never thought we would be going through. We laugh at the wand, the doctors, the medication, and even ourselves. We talked about cycles, breast milk (mostly mine), husbands and of course their sperms (don’t worry Hun not yours). We eat, and some of us (not me) drank a nice wine. We watched the end of Pretty in Pink. It was a great evening, and it was not anti-mother’s day or anti-motherhood it was just 5 women trying to make it through one day that we all find hard.

It was nice we didn’t have to pretend, or smile. We didn’t have to deal with “the when are you going to have children questions”. We didn’t have to fake it till we make it.

We just got to be 5 women that are trying whatever it takes to join the mommy club. Instead of celebrating us as mothers, we celebrate that we had it made it this far. We celebrate that we are doing something that most women take for granted, we celebrated that we are doing this infertility thing with new found friends. We celebrate that when the world forgets about us or our emotion on this day that there are other women in the world just like us. And we did it all with laughter, food, drinks and for once no tears.

It Started Off Normal...

2010-05-07T16:59:00.001-05:00

Today started off normal, but with me, normal means a day filled with headaches. Drove the Hun to work, came home, went back to bed, and woke up to the phone ringing. When I answer the phone little did I know that it would change my day?

The girl on the other line was asking if I wanted to have my throat ultrasound today since they had a cancellation. I of course jumped at the new appointment time.

11:20 am

I figure they would say my lump is just fat. If you know me you know I have fat.

I showed up early and was in by 11:20. I explained the lump location to the tech, she was not sure if they could see it, but she would give it a try.

Well she try did and she couldn't see my lump of complaint...

But she found another lump and node on a lymph gland ( I think one that starts with an S). She leaves. Minutes later the Doctor enters, he remembers me from my other U/S ( not good) he asks if he can feel the lump that I was first complaining about. He agrees that is not the lump they found.

Looks like I have a second lump and a node on the left side of my throat/neck. He is recommending a CT scan, actually he said an emergency ct scan. I should hear from my family doctor early next week.

I called the Hun from the parking lot.

I went to lunch with my friend, Becky

When Food shopping.

Came home and google

And googled some more...

I'm so mad at myself, I could spit

2010-05-06T16:13:00.000-05:00

So do you like my new blog design?
Well I don't. I screwed up and now I got this one. Don't you just hate when you screw up a computer thing that you can't fix. I deleted my blog background while trying to fix the Hun's new blog background, apparently i forgot to logout of my account. I'm so mad right now, I could spit. I wish I had been smart and backup my background when I got it. I'm hoping the web designer can just re-enter it.

I miss my background.

Canada Post Finally delievered It and Thank you LIS

2010-05-06T13:34:00.000-05:00

I have to send out a big thanks to Lia over at Built in Birth Control for this cute

I love cute trendy kitchen/dinning-wares like this. Using items like these always make me smile.

April's Blood Test Is In

2010-05-05T15:07:00.001-05:00

Dr. A's Nurse called today, actually about 20 mins ago. My April's prolactin level is in. It's not good! Okay mine are never good. But it's worst now then even 4 months ago. It's up and it's High. I should remind you March's number was 42, (I'm thinking there was an error, I think it should have been 142). 42 to is still twice the level for normal high, it's 4+ times the mean number.

April's level is 175.2.

I would like to thank my tumour for wrecking another day, for robbing all the joy I was having today.

April's Secert Pals

2010-05-03T17:04:00.001-05:00

I have to thank my secret pal Lis over at Built In Birth Control for all her support this month. Lis is a wonderful woman who is going thought this IF with grace and a great spirit. Lis I'm keeping my fingers crossed that this cycle works for you and your hubby.

Just Waiting For The Doctor To Call

2010-04-30T11:24:00.000-05:00

~~January~~

~~February~~

~~March~~

~~April~~

May

June

April's blood test is done and I'm waiting to hear from Dr. A. Two more months and I find if I move on to surgery.

I know my Dr. A says that I could loose my fertility total, but I have found a study that says most women regain it after the Pituitary surgery. I think I will print out that study to show her when we meet with her in July.

Move Over Magical Beans, there is a New Magical Veggie & This 1 Does Something Then Make You Toot

2010-04-29T16:33:00.001-05:00

Beans Beans the magical fruit

the more you toot...

I'm not sure what makes beans magical but I think they better move over for the

Magical Yams

Who knew that Yams where this magical veggie that can help with infertility.
This month I've decide to the Wild Yam Cream by Heartland Natural as my natural source of progesterone. I'm hoping it will help. Let let you know how this turns out and if my AF shows up.

Sunday Sayings

2010-04-25T17:28:00.000-05:00

Every day declare for yourself what you want in life. Declare it as though you have it. - Author Unknown

W ow! Really? Anyone buying this one?

I'm not!!!!!!

I'm sure over the past 7 years I've declared my wants more then once day. So where is my children? If life was truly this simple I wouldn't need this blog to vent.

I think the pigeon might get her wants before I get mine.

Once again I'm declaring (just for the record) I want a baby. So let's see if in nine months I have a baby.

Another Blood Test and Another Waiting List

2010-04-21T18:27:00.000-05:00

I saw my family doctor today. I made a comment to her that I had seen Dr. Jock yesterday and he didn't seem to understand the Endo system and she had a good laugh. I'm had to go for more blood test and I'm waiting to have an ultrasound (June 1st is the first available date. So I better get start liking this golf ball feeling I have.
On the other side, Dr. A (my Endo) actually called me back finally (3 days later). She thinks it's an infection too; she thinks my thyroid maybe involved and was happy to hear I'm getting a u/s done. Dr. A is so happy that my prolactin level is coming down. However my other hormones are still really low. I talked to about my ~~low~~ no sex drive and she said that the Metformin should help that and if not we will look at when and if my prolactin level ever comes down to normal. The only thing see can offer is to increase my Norprolac once my April Blood test are in. As for my restoring my fertility, that will be a wait and see.

So I wait and I will see with what feels like this in my throat...

Another Lump

2010-04-20T13:04:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm home from the doctors’ office so much for my break month; I have to go back tomorrow. I'm still waiting to hear from my Endo too. I have a lump in my throat and the young doctor ( Dr. Jock, my name for him) at the walking thought it was my tonsils, I had to explain to Dr Jock that I had them and my adenoids out just before my 16 birthday. I even had to explain to Dr. Jock what a Prolactin producing Pituitary tumour was; apparently he was at one long kegger while at med school. Dr. Jock wants me to see my regular family doctor tomorrow since he real didn’t know anything about the Endo system.

I have to say this lump in my throat is scaring me since 4 of my Granny's brothers and her dad have died of throat cancer. I might be over reacting but since I already have on tumour I worry about this stuff.

Sunday Sayings & Maybe the End to my Break

2010-04-19T10:13:00.000-05:00

An Apple a Day keeps the doctor...

Who ever said that had been diagnosed with a Endocrinology problem. It looks like my break from Doctor this month maybe over. :(

So so the past couple of months I've been not been right, I've had these bad pains around/under my tongue and down my throat along with the feel of having a golf ball in my throat. Not all time just every so often and this is around the time I get these bad pains in my right side.

After being in pain since Friday afternoon, I called my Endo today, her nurse though she may want to see me. So there goes my break and so much for an apple day keeping the blood doctor away.

My Break

2010-04-18T06:01:00.001-05:00

This month I’m taking a break. Well, as much as a break as you can take when you have a brain tumour. I’m still taking my meds and doing my blood test (I wish there was a break from these); really my break is from physically going to see my doctors and doing internet research search.

Normally I see my family doctor, 1-2 times a month ( yes I’m a drain on the Canadian Health Care system), so they can monitor my weight, mental health, BP, headaches, back pain and of course the tumour . Then I spend hours on our computer trying to figure out my next step; my next treatment and the side effect of surgery. Right before I started my break I was once again researching going to India for surgery, if my Endo choose not to recommend me for surgery of if my unknown neurosurgeon choices not to do the surgery. I have to say I don’t feel like I’m just a guinea pig this month. I like the way I’m feeling this month maybe I will extend it till June.

1 Word

2010-04-14T12:52:00.000-05:00

I saw this on Wishing 4 One who had seen it on Kristin's blog who saw it on Calliope's blog and wanted to play along.

You can leave your answers in the comments section or play along on your own blog. Be sure to let Calliope know you played though.

Simple rules...

U.
Can.
Only.
Type.
1.
Word!

No.
Explanations.

Here goes....

1. Yourself: Simple

2. Your ~~boyfriend/girlfriend~~ husband: Hungarian

3. Your hair: Black

4. Your mother/~~stepmother~~: Abrupt

5. Your dog: Dead

6. Your favorite item: GG

7. Your dream last night: Odd

8. Your favorite drink: Ice-tea

9. Your dream car: Bentley

10. The room you are in: Natural

12. Your fear: Engineering

13. What you want to be in 10 years: United

14. Who you hung out with last night: Support-group

15. What you’re not: Follower

16. Muffin: Poppyseed

17: One of your wish list items: Dishwasher

18: Time: Dragging

19. The last thing you did: Type

20. What you are wearing: PJs

21. Your favorite weather: Snow

22. Your favorite book: History

23. The last thing you ate: Pineapple

24. Your life: Ours

25. Your mood: Indiffernt

26. Your best friend(S): Sweet

27. What are you thinking about right now? goodbyes

28. Your car: Green

29. What are you doing at the moment?: Listening

30. Your summer: Long

31. Your relationship status: Married

32. What is on your TV?: Nothing

33. What is the weather like?: Rainy

34. When is the last time you laughed?: earlier

Not as easy as you might think…

We've Fallen Into A Nice Routine

2010-04-13T10:25:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was the GG and CC 9th Birthday (yes I’m the crazy cat lady), a day that I was told two weeks ago we would not have GG here to celebrate. Well the Doctor was wrong; GG is still here and doing better since we took her off the pain medication.

The Hun and I are amazed at how well GG is doing considering two weeks ago we were wondering if she would even make it one week, after being diagnosed.
GG life has changes, she aged more than I thought possible in a very short time. GG spends most of her day in her basket with the heating pad on or on the back of the love-seat lying on my Mexican blanket sunning. When she eats, it’s a bit a time and it takes her a bit longer than before. She still enjoys chin rubs and her belly rubs. GG has always been a cuddle bug, and she is even more of a cuddle bug now, especial in the evening while we are watching TV. GG likes to spend the last part of her evening in our bed cuddling with the Hun while he reads his bible out loud to her.

GG has fallen in to a nice routine, and she seems like she may be with us for a while. This is something that both the Hun and I are thankful for. I have to say that the last two weeks have been a time for goodbyes and anytime that we may have to let her go we are both ready for it. The Hun and I have both had our time to love her and to let her know that we are happy that she was one of our kitty-girls.

Sunday Sayings

2010-04-12T00:20:00.000-05:00

Everyone is a friend, until they prove otherwise - Author Unknown

I picked this saying for my Sunday Sayings, because of what I witness a friend go through today as she hosted a baby shower for two of her "friends". The comments that where made while I was helping my friend set up has bothered me all day. The hostess went out of her way to make the day special for the new moms and they just seem to be unhappy with it all. While I was at the event there were no thanks or this is wonderful (to the hostess), there was no thank you to me for helping the hostess. This is not the first time these women have been rude or uncaring to the hostess. I truly feel that that they have proven that they are not friends.

Sunday Sayings

2010-04-04T17:26:00.000-05:00

“A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life.”- 1670 J. Ray Irish Proverbs

2010-04-03T10:35:00.001-05:00

I’ve decide to Metformin again. I’m hoping now that my prolactin level is only 4X my non-pregnant friends levels that it may help loose all my extra fat that I’ve gained thanks to my body thinking it is pregnant.

With this great news that my body is starting to work with the Norprolac, it has me dreaming of babies again. I know I shouldn’t, but when you dream is to be pregnant and have you DH children it’s hard to stop yourself. I’ve talked to the Hun and he too finds himself thinking that way too. Last night we even talked about all those baby names we picked out years ago, and the fact if (and that is a big IF) we would get pregnant we would still use them. Hard to believe after years of having sky-high prolactin levels and a life of doctor appointments and medication, just to get a period (SORRY TMI) suddenly my body is liking the Norprolac and is stopping producing Prolactin.

Maybe next month my level will be normal. Keeping my fingers crossed for that.

To Metformin or not to Metformin?

2010-04-01T18:31:00.000-05:00

Since finding out that my prolactin is 42, I've been debating if I want to start metformin again and see if I have any success with the little white pills again. Last time I was on them I lost no weight and it didn'ty do anything for my skin or anything else that it is said to help. I'm just not sure what I should do? Any advice from anyone would be great.

Aprils Prolactin Level

2010-03-31T16:16:00.000-05:00

So my Dr. A ( my Endo) just called she said my prolactin level is down to 42. 42!!!! This is the lowest I've ever been in 7 years. Here I thought I would be shy high because of my stressful week and here it at an all time low for me. It's still not normal, but it is closer then before.

3dw

2010-03-31T09:17:00.000-05:00

So I've been doing monthly blood test for almost six month now, and quarterly blood test for years. I do them at the same lab since we moved to toontown. I was told that since every lab has a different result/ normal it's best to get the test for prolactin at the same lab. Besides going to the same lab, I even do the same routine, the day and night before, I take out as many variables as possible, I'm not sure if this the right thing to do or not. Except this month, this month all routines and things have been thrown out the window. I figured my stress level is all ready at the highest it's been in years, why try to manage the other factors. I'm sure my Dr. A will freak when she see my levels ( lets face it when you have to go buy a new bra, more then likely the prolactin level is super high). My BFF and Hun thought if she see this high prolactin level maybe she will stop the six month wait!!! Personally I think she will just up my dose of norprolac, and the six month wait will carry on. But I guess I will knew in a couple of days.

Blood Tests, and Hate

2010-03-29T22:29:00.000-05:00

I’m going for my monthly blood test tomorrow. I was going to go Saturday but I figure with all the stress in my life, I better wait a day or two. My prolactin level goes up with stress. I can’t image what my prolactin level is right now; I guess I will know in a few days. I have to say my level is the least of my worries.
For the first time in years, I have to say, I could really careless about my tumour, and fighting to have surgery and all the crap that has comes with my Pituitary Tumour.
I have to say that I hate the words tumour, mass, and abnormal cells, I hate that my life has been touched by my tumour. But I hate it even more that my kitty-girl has to deal with the pain that comes from this ugly word. I hate that my baby is in pain and there is nothing I can do but give her pain meds and comfort in her last days. I hate that her life is being cut short by these abnormal cells that have hidden inside her body.
I hate abnormal cells, masses, and tumors.

2010-03-29T11:44:00.001-05:00

Well we made it through the weekend. GG is holding her own, and the Hun and I are emotional drained.

Yesterday, GG end up having a good day, something that was shocking since Saturday had been such a bad day. She was doing so well we end up taking her outside to the R/C field to take some photos of our babygirl. She was so happy, and the fresh air did her well. GG came home had a bite to eat and sleep through the night

The Events of Yesterday

2010-03-27T06:32:00.000-05:00

Yesterday morning when we woke up at 3:00am we were greet by some unpleasant surprises left by our GG. I spent my first part of the morning cleaning and getting the Hun ready for work and driving him. By the time I got home I was greeted by another unpleasant surprise and my very lovable, cuddle kitty girl didn’t want to be loved. I knew we need to go to the vet.

I spent the second half of my morning at the vet, watching my girl be pushed and probed, and answering so many questions and agreeing that on an action plan (blood tests, pee test, x-rays and ultrasound). I was told I would know results by 3:00pm. The Dr.F figure it was pancreatitis, a manageable disease. I had only four short hours to wait for the results.

I came home and called the Hun, to help kill the time. 3:00pm came and went and no word. Then at 3:20pm while on my cell phone with the Hun, the vet called and asked me to come in they wanted to discuss GG results. The only thing I asked was if it was bad? And was told they need to speak to me in person. I hung the phones, and somehow drove the 3kms to the vet’s.

As I wait for the vet to come and talk to me I watched other sick animals and their parents come and go and have to say the vet’s office is not a happy place.
The Dr. F and her student, A came out got me, we went in to a exam room, there another lady was waiting for me. Dr. F talked about GG’s labs and how for an older kitty who had an obesity issues, her labs were good, but when they did the ultrasound, they found something they were not even looking for. They found a tumour, a rather large one, 7 cm by 9 cms (2.8 x 3.5inches) on her pancreases and it was growing into her liver. I was told GG was in pain and that they could control the pain level but other than that was real nothing they could do at this point. This is not what I except to hear.

After being given instructions, pain medication and GG back, I called the Hun and broke the news that one of our baby girls was dying. I asked him to come home early and somehow made the drive back home.
We spend last night with our girls, we bought GG a new bed and put her favorite blank in it and that is where she has been since. I want her lasts days (Dr. F gave her about 2 weeks) to be filled with love and cuddles.
Last night as I laid in bed without my GG cuddling me I realized that my baby will more than likely not make it to her 9th Birthday. That CC, her beloved sister and companion will now be a lonely kitty with no one to clean her ears and bit at her paws.

I have to say life is pretty shitty right now.

GG is Sick

2010-03-26T14:49:00.002-05:00

I spend the first of my morning cleaning up after my sick fur-baby, then the second half of my morning I spent it in the vets off as an emergency walk-in patient with G.G.

G.G is currently undergoing a bunch of tests; the doctors think my “baby” has pancreatitis. They hope to have the answer by 3:00pm, today. I’m hoping that she will be able to come home tonight, since no one likes to have stay in the hospital.

If she needs to stay in tonight I'm going to see if I can't take her a blanket and her meow bed. I can't image how scared she is right now, the poor thing is hooked up to an IV and is man-handled.

I have to say I'm not handling the stress of my sick little girl very well, I just want her to come home and be here with us.

Our New Normal

2010-03-25T20:26:00.001-05:00

The Hun was able to move in to his new position, and it’s been great to have him home. My new job is not a temp to perm position (as I had been lead to believe) but I’ll have work for a couple of more weeks. I’m still looking for another steady job and still trying to figure out how I can save a crap load of money in case I need to go to India for surgery (that’s another post for another day).

Right now we are trying to figure out our how life is going to work with these different schedules. I mean right now the Hun is off Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays, and I’m off on the weekend. So we are trying to figure out a groove of how things will work, around the house. I mean when I wasn’t working I didn’t mind being his Social Secretary, chief cook and bottle washer, but now that I’m working full time I’m not up for all the extra “hats”.

The Hun is really enjoying his 3 days off a week, he is getting a lot done off his honey do list, like replacing the brakes on the car. He even BBQ dinner tonight, it was so nice to come home and have dinner made for me for a change. We had a date night this week, pizza and a movie, The Blind Side.

I have to say if this is going to be our new normal, I’m all for it. I’m pretty sure the Hun likes this new normal too.

2010-03-17T08:26:00.000-05:00

So the Hun was going to be changing to his new position this week, and we were all happy about it. Last night was this last night run. Well it is not.

The Hun called about 20 mins ago to say the guy that was just hired to take his run, didn't show up for the ride along. So it means the Hun has to run tonight again. Which we are not happy about. Also he will more then likely will not be starting days anytime soon, since they will not move him until they find a new person to take his run.

I'm so not happy right now.
Oh yeah Happy St. Patty's Day.

2010-03-13T18:22:00.001-06:00

times they are a changing-Bob Dylan

Not only will be on Mountain time now we will be on a semi-regular work schedule, in our house. The past (almost) two years we have been a household that lives for the 3rd shift (23:00 to about 11:00). Well that is all ending Wednesday morning. Then come Friday morning the Hun will be starting his new schedule, (5:00 am to about 5:00pm). See times are a changing for us!

Phone, Numbers and Filing

2010-03-11T07:31:00.000-06:00

Yesterday went well, but of course there was so much information to take in (I hope I remember some of it today). I have to say I came home and felt that I was going to fall asleep at any moment, I actually managed to stay a wake until 10:00 so I could drive the Hun to work. Who knew answering the phone, playing with numbers and filing a stack of papers could make you so tired?

As for my headaches, they were manageable yesterday, so I think I should be fine in that department.

Well off for my second day, hope more information sticks today.

My Last Day as a Kept Woman

2010-03-09T22:27:00.000-06:00

Today, was my last day as a kept woman. In a few short hours I'll be starting my new job. I’m looking forward to this new job but at the same time I’m nervous about working again. I hope everything goes well, wish me luck.

February's Prolactin Level

2010-03-02T10:21:00.001-06:00

I called my Endo's nurse ( BA) today and asked what my February's prolactin level was 107.1 . Still to High. Lower then December's number but no wear near normal. I had told the Hun on Saturday morning before my test that I was still over a 100. BA said the Dr. A would call me tomorrow to talk about this latest result.

**Prolactin**
Non-pregnant women	Less than 25 mcg/L (SI units) or 25 nanograms per millilitre (ng/mL)
Men	Less than 20 mcg/L (SI units) or 20 ng/mL
Pregnant women	20 to 400 mcg/L (SI units) or 20 to 400 ng/mL

A True Friend

2010-03-01T17:56:00.001-06:00

I'm a facebooker (is that the right term) and right now my status reads

A true friend doesn't care what you're wearing, if your home is tidy or not, if your car is making funny noises, that you only have $5 in the bank this week, or that you and your loved ones aren't perfect and do actually fight...a true friend just likes you for you! Repost this if you have at least one true friend .

I have to say this really speaks to what I feel friendship and family relationships should be. There are to many people who throw around the word "blessing" to describe there friends and themselves without honestly seeing their friends or their true self.

debbs-ology

2010-03-01T14:39:00.000-06:00

I saw this on Wishing 4 one and Trying not to Scream's blogs and since the rule is if you read it you must complete I followed suite.

Rules: YOU! Yes, you, reading this. You're tagged. Now that you know more about me than you ever wanted to know, play the game, it's fun! Let others know a little more about yourself, repost this as your name followedy by "ology."

FOODOLOGY:

What is your salad dressing of choice? Russian
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? Cracker Barrel, I wish they would bring one to Canada
What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Burger King
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? Cheddar Cheese Perogies
What are your pizza toppings of choice? Cheese
How many televisions are in your house? 1
What color cell phone do you have? Black

BIOLOGY:
Are you right-handed or left-handed? Right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? Moles(x2), wisdom teeth, and tonsils
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? Nope
Have you ever fainted? Nope

BULLCRAPOLOGY:
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? Yes
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I would change it just not sure to what
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? 1
Last person you talked to? To a telemarketer

FAVORITOLOGY:
Season? Fall
Holiday? Canada Day
Day of the week? Wednesday
Month? September
Color? Don't have one
Drink? Ice tea
Alcoholic? Vodka

CURRENTOLOGY:
Missing someone? Yes
What are you listening to? White noise
What are you watching? NCIS
Worrying about? Everyday things
What's the last movie you saw? Valentines Day
Do you smile often? Yes
If you could change your eye color what would it be? Brown
What's on your wish list for your birthday?To be Healthy
Can you do a chin-up? Nope
Does the future make you more nervous or excited? neither
Have you been in a car wreck? Yes
Have you caused a car wreck? no
Do you have an accent? When I'm made yes
Last time you cried? This morning
Plans tonight? Not sure
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? Yes
Name three things you bought yesterday? Nothing yesterday, but the day before a Lottery ticket for charity, light bulbs for my car, and a bottle of Mr.Clean.
Have you met someone who changed your life? Yes.
For the better or worse? In some way always for the better.
How did you bring in the New Year? With my dear Husband and our Cats
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? yes
What songs do you sing in the shower? Song by The Rankin Family
Have you held hands with someone today? no but I held someones paw today
Who was the last person you took a picture of?Our Cats
Are most of the friends in your life new or old? Both
Do you like pulpy orange juice? No
Last time you ate peanut butter and jelly? A week ago
What were you doing at 12 a.m. last night? Doing our Taxes
What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?My Husband

99 things

2010-02-27T18:54:00.001-06:00

You've heard of the "Bucket List", this is similar. Someone wrote up 99 things to do before you die and it's been going around the internet. I was reading Pregnant Yuppy's Blog and found this list on it and thought it would be fun to do.

Bold the things that you've done...
1. Started your own blog - Yep.
2. Slept under the stars - yes once
3. Played in a band - Does the school band count? If so yes
4. Visited Hawaii - can't say that I want to.
5. Watched a meteor shower - Yep
6. Given more than you can afford to charity - Caused me to do # 67
7. Been to DisneyWorld - Been to what everyone is in California
8. Climbed a mountain - Nope and it will never happen
9. Held a praying mantis - A what???
10. Sang a solo - if singing in the shower counts, then yes.
11. Bungee jumped - No
12. Visited Paris - Yes.
13. Watched a lightning storm - Yes
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch - Cross stitch
15. Adopted a child - No
16. Had food poisoning - Yes
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty - Nope but I drove a 18 wheeler through the Bronx,NY
18. Grown your own vegetables - Yes
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France - Nope.
20. Slept on an overnight train - Yes
21. Had a pillow fight - Nope
22. Hitch hiked - No, how would now days.
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill - Hell why not people with kids take the day off when their kids are sick.
24. Built a snow fort - I grow-up in Winnipeg, MB, Canada so what do you think?
25. Held a lamb - Yes
26. Gone skinny dipping - Nope I don't want the fishies to see me
27. Run a Marathon -I don't run
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice -No
29. Seen a total eclipse - Yes, I believe I was in Kindergarten
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset - More then I can count
31. Hit a home run -No
32. Been on a cruise -No
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person -No, since they don't let semis park there
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors -Yes, England
35. Seen an Amish community - No, wish I could
36. Taught yourself a new language -Yes, but I've lost it now
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied -No, I think that might take the fun out of life
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person -No
39. Gone rock climbing - No
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David -No.
41. Sung karaoke - Yes, but it was a dare.
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt -No
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant - Yes
44. Visited Africa -No
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight - Yes, on our Honeymoon
46. Been transported in an ambulance - Yes, thanks to my dear husband, also been in more tow trucks then I count and in a cop car.
47. Had your portrait painted - no
48. Gone deep sea fishing - No, I'm allergic to salt water
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person - No.
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris -no
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling - Ino
52. Kissed in the rain - Yes, there is nothing like it.
53. Played in the mud -Yes, I do it all the time
54. Gone to a drive-in theater -No
55. Been in a movie - No
56. Visited the Great Wall of China - No desire to
57. Started a business -No
58. Taken a martial arts class -no
59. Visited Russia - No
60. Served at a soup kitchen - Yes
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies -Well Girl Guide Cookies, so YES and I hated it.
62. Gone whale watching - no
63. Got flowers for no reason -well there is always a reason but I can't go in to that on this.
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma -not allowed since I lived in England during the mad cow scare
65. Gone sky diving - Nope
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp - Yes,everyone should have to see one, it humbles you
67. Bounced a cheque - Yes, see Number 6
68. Flown in a helicopter - no
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy -yes
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial -no, but I almost took out a bridge in DC because I was to big to go under it.
71. Eaten Caviar - Yes, it was very salty
72. Pieced a quilt -Yes thanks to Girl Guides
73. Stood in Times Square -No, but I've been to London's Piccadilly Circus. I image they are the same.
74. Toured the Everglades -No but do you know they grow corn in the Everglades and Canada buy it.
75. Been fired from a job - Yes, I have happy to be fired
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London -Yes, I learned my Great Uncle Dick was a Palace grad at one time
77. Broken a bone - Yes my elbow
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle - Yes, I have a burn mark on my leg from the muffler
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person - Yes, as a teenager,
80. Published a book -No, but I dream of writing a children book
81. Visited the Vatican - No
82. Bought a brand new car - Yes and I will never do that again.
83. Walked in Jerusalem - Nope
84. Had your picture in the newspaper - No that would be a little trailer trashy
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve - Yes,
86. Visited the White House - No
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating - Yes, this to was thanks to Girl Guides
88. Had chickenpox - Yes, twice and my Cabbage patch had them to the first time
89. Saved someone’s life -no but I've been the fist at 2 accidents and been at to many peoples Death to count.
90. Sat on a jury - No
91. Met someone famous - Yes,
92. Joined a book club -No
93. Got a tattoo - No
94. Had a baby - No
95. Seen the Alamo in person - No, But I knew several version of Davy Crockett song
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake - No. I acoid salt water since I'm allergic to salt water
97. Been involved in a law suit -no
98. Owned a cell phone - Yes and they are always the base model.
99. Been stung by a bee - I'm saying yes, because I step on a nest of flying yellow and black bugs and I was stung all over.

So I have done 40/99. I guess I need to get out more. How about you?

Blood Test Day

2010-02-27T00:54:00.012-06:00

To is my monthly blood test.

I should know my Prolactin level by Wednesday. My Endo should call to let me know is my Norprolac need to be increased or if I will stay at 150mcg.

I thinking I will be increased to 225mcg since I have not seen any physical signs that they Norprolac is dropping my Prolactin level, in the last two months.

I can't wait to hear what my levels is, my Endo called Norprolac, the best and bright of medication used to treat Pituitary tumours. I can't say that I'm finding it is working any better than the other medication.

Here's hoping it really the best and brightest and it is secretly working.

2010-02-27T00:01:00.001-06:00

I just love this song. It is such a wonderful song I thought I would share it. Also if anyone knows where I can get the sheet music for it let me know.

Books, Pink Eye , Gold Metal and Christmas

2010-02-26T17:32:00.001-06:00

Yesterday was a crazy day that didn't end until the early hours of this morning.

For the first time in a 1-1/2 years I worked a temp job. I know some people hate working temp but I have to say I like it. I like the change that comes from being at a new place. The place I was at yesterday was such an easy place and the people were so nice there, that is always a bonus. I was just answering the phone and transferring calls, it was a little on the dull side so in the afternoon, I brought a book and read between phone calls (which the boss said was fine). I started to read my last Christmas book, Fall on Your Knees (made it to page 115) and have to say I'm really liking it. I can't believe they paid me to read.

After getting home from my long day of paid reading, I arrived home to a sick husband, well not sick but not up to par. The Hun woke up with a blood shot eye, eye pain and blurred vision, I actually thought he got punched in the eye (asked if him and my cat had a fight over the bed again). After doing all the home remedies you can do, we end up in the ER.

The ER was kind of empty, which is odd, but a nice change. How every with that being said we still waited long enough to watch the women's gold metal hockey game. Everyone in the hospital was happy that our Girls won.

After the Game end we just waited and waited. We were actually at the hospital for 5 hours. At the end we left with a Rx for sulfur and news that the Hun has Conjunctivitis, AKA Pink Eye.

It was such along day and then today started way too early. Here is to sleeping in this weekend.

P.S Oh yeah, we are now less then 10 months away from Christmas. Have you started your Christmas shopping yet? I have and I'm almost done.

I Have To Eat More To Loose Weight!!!

2010-02-24T18:20:00.003-06:00

I meet with my dietitian, Dana, today, and I have to say I’m glad I went. Dana knew and understood what a Microprolactinomas adenoma; she told me she has one other client with it. She is willing and wanting to do research on how High Prolactin level effects the body. It’s always a plus when someone in health care is willing to learn from your illness.

Dana and I talked about my eating habits, I explained that I’m not a big eater and that since both my parents have had health issues I avoid salt. I also explain that I don’t really like food. The Hun says if I was skinny, he would be worried I have an eating disorder, I told Dana this. I’m sure Dana thought I was crazy to say, since I’m a plus size girl.

After talking about my eating habits and looking at the fake food Dana, agree that my eating habits are bad (not that I eat bad food, but I just don’t eat enough). We went over the Canadian Food Guide, and I found out that I’m not meeting the recommend daily servings. Dana thinks I’ve slowed down my metabolism, to a point that it made be almost stopped.

Dana is sending a letter to my family doctor and asking for additional test to be done. My part of fixing this problem is to slowly start eating more (I find this funny since I’m trying to lose weight). I’m meeting with her again at the end of April and she will be calling to check in every couple of weeks. So I better go eat, another apple.

2010-02-23T23:55:00.000-06:00

Tomorrow, I have my meeting with dietitian from the Chronic Disease Management Program. I have to say I real don't want to go. I'm just going so I can tell my doctor's I did it.

Wonderful Generous Gifts vs Crappy Gift

2010-02-23T09:26:00.003-06:00

My friend, Beckie in a couple of days will be celebrating her 26^th Birthday. So to celebrate she is giving away a blog design by This Giggly Girl Designs to one of her followers, the winner will be picked March 4, 2010.

Beckie is my friend that gifted me with my wonderful new blog design. Beckie’s generous heart has also inspired Alison of The Privileged Infertile and This Giggly Girl Design to give away a Blog design away too. See both of these wonderful blogs for details.

What wonderful gifts these two ladies are giving away. This got me thinking about all the crappy gifts I’ve received over the years and trust me there have been a lot of them. So I decide to come up with my top 10 crappy gift list. So here they are from best (if you can say that about a crappy gift) to worst.

10. A white metal Coat rack (I was 16 and it was my Christmas gift from parents)

9. A shovel (another Christmas gift from my parents)

8. Deep Fryer (Christmas gift to The Hun and me, but I’m the one that cooks, so not a gift to me)

7. A $17.00 Teflon Pot and Pan set (the Teflon came of the first time I cooked with it, Birthday gift)

6. Children’s Bubble Bath ( It was an Christmas gift when I turned 22 and I have a Bladder disease and don’t uses bubble baths and the person asked me about it the day before gifting it to me.)

5. Loose Tea (I to was asked if I drink loose tea and said I don’t drink loose tea, then I was giving like a 6 month supply)

4. A Battery Booster (Valentine’s Day Gift)

3. 2 Used Coloring books (It was a Christmas gift from my Aunt and Uncle when I was about 5, I remember pointing out that some of the pages were done already)

2. A mini out house (Christmas gift from my mom)

1. A Used Free Pen that a used car lot gave a way for free. (That wonderful gift was given to me for my 8^th Birthday from one of my Grandfather)

If you are wondering I have never re-gifted any of these or any other gifts, I have received. All my crappy gifts have ended up being donated, returned or thrown out. Each year I hope for good gifts and each year I end up with a couple of the crappy gifts.

A Big Thank-You for my New Blog Design

2010-02-21T21:26:00.001-06:00

I have to send a big THANK YOU to Beckie for gifting me with my new custom blog design . Beckie your are such a awesome, generous, and caring person, I'm lucky to have you as a friend.

Also to Alison over at This Giggle Girl Designs thank you for all your hard work on designing me such a wonderful blog. Alison, you have so much talent.

Good Night Moon, Hello Sunshine

2010-02-18T12:07:00.000-06:00

Yesterday the Hun called his dispatcher and they talked about the chance of the Hun getting the day time position, which he applied for late last week. His dispatcher mentioned that he believe that the Hun was the front runner for the position. Hearing this, gave us hope, that The Hun might get to say

Today the Hun was home early from work, and we were dreaming about the new shift, when his cell rang. It was the HR department and they just called to say that the Hun has the new shift!!!!!! It looked like everyone’s crossed fingers worked.

The Hun can't start the new shift until they find someone for his current shift, the HR guy said," it should be only about 3 weeks until he starts running days." Not only will he be running days (5:00 a.m. to 5:00pm), he will only be working 4 days a week.

I can't wait to have my DH home 3 days a week and to have in bed every night. ;) The Hun can't wait to say,

Finger Crossed

2010-02-16T12:29:00.000-06:00

Late last week the Hun applied for a new position at work, the closing date for the posting was yesterday. We hopefully will hear in the next few days about the new position.

Right now the Hun works about 14 hours a day times 5 days, so that 70 hours a weeks. If he gets the new position he will only be working a total of 56 hours a week for the same pay of doing 70 hours per week.

The Hun will be still driving turnpike doubles, for those of you that don’t know that mean the Hun drive a semi while pulling two 40-something foot long trailers with a dolly in the center at the same time. It works out to be about 110 feet in total length. It’s a lot of wheels he is dealing with.

Beside fewer hours per week, he will be working during the day and he will have 3 days off every week. It would be so nice to have my DH home 3 days a week.

Fingers crossed that the Hun gets this new position.

L-O-V-E

2010-02-14T00:01:00.006-06:00

Since today is Valentine's day I thought I would share one of the reason why I fell in love with the Hun. I also figure I would share one of our traditions. The Hun has a a wonderful singing voice ( That one of the reason's why I love him). When we started dating he would always sing to me all the time. Now when I'm sick from medical producers or the medication he sings to me too. He always sings;

L is for the way you look at me

O is for the only one I see

V is very, very extraordinary

E is even more than anyone that you adore and

The Hun always seems to know when I need to hear our song. Yes,we are old souls and we have a song!!! Our song is L-O-V-E by Nate King Cole ( if you couldn't guess). I love this song, every time I hear it being sung I remember how much I L-O-V-E the Hun.

Love is all that I can give to you

Love is more than just a game for two

Two in love can make it

Take my heart and please don't break it

Love was made for me and you

How can you not love lyrics like this, how could you not fall in L-O-V-E with a man that sings this song to you.

I Love You Hun !!

XOXOX

Happy Valentine's Day!

2010-02-11T18:32:00.003-06:00

Happy and then I was indifferent and I'm now kind of sad

i can't belive it Tuesay already.

2010-02-09T23:01:00.000-06:00

I can't believe that it's Tuesday already. I've barely recovered from our very busy weekend and it is almost hump day again. Last weekend was busier then I like my weekends to be and more emotional than I thought it would be.

Last weekend started with the Hun going for an eye exam and getting fitted for his first pair of contacts, we celebrate by having ribs for lunch. From lunch we went shopping for a new pair of sun glasses for the Hun. While shopping we started looking for the perfect baby gift for our soon to be niece. We think we found the perfect gift (this was the emotional part; buying gifts for something you will more than likely never get to have is hard, especial when you are in the middle of fighting to have it too) after going to another store to pick it up what we hope is a perfect baby gift we finally came home to watch a movie.

Saturday: Our regular coffee/breakfast with the Hun's R/C club guys and their wives. Then over to get my hair cut, I cut off about 10" of hair. While I was in the chair the Hun went looking for another set of sun glasses. The Hun is worst then a woman when shopping for watches and/or glasses. We walked around mall, picked up another month of Norprolac and my sleeping pills, and while at the pharmacy I had to explain to the new pharmacist what my medication was used for, always a joy.

On the way home stopped at staples (another place the Hun shopping skills can drive me nuts) for staples. Next door to Staple is Winners and London's Drug so we stopped in there to look for sunglasses too. We found a pair of cool looking glasses in London Drugs. I did my happy dance. Then we went to Winners to look for more baby items, since they have designer baby clothes. Then we came home and just relaxed.

On Sunday, I went out with my friend for breakfast and end up shopping for 4 hours. When I got home the Hun was internet shopping for R/C part, he only bought an engine for a plane he is reworking. Then it was off to bed for the Hun since he starts his shift late on Sundays. I got things ready for another week and made something the Hun's family calls French Salad (some people call it Russian salad). And Before I knew it I was kissing the Hun good-bye at the door.

An Update

2010-02-08T13:28:00.001-06:00

I had to call today and confirm that I would be attending the 1 hour appointment. I asked the girl if she could tell me a little about the program that I was enrolled in since the website has a couple different programs on it.

She grabs my file and says that I'm not enrolled in any program, that I just have a one hour meeting with a dietitians, since this is just a review since I have had diabetes counseling before. (Blood pressure starts to rise)

WHAT??? YEAH JUST MY LUCK!!!!!!!

I explained to her that I don't have Diabetes and my insulin is fine considering the triplet bolus test I did back in November 2009 was fine. I also explained that the Metformin was doing nothing for me and since I have no cyst on my ovaries, and truly no one can give a PCOS dx while I have a tumour.

The girl was like I will keep you booked in, but we will be be contacting your family doctor to see why you are being sent here because we don't normally deal with people with Pituitary tumours.

So now I what? Now I just wait and see if Canada Health Care system can make roome for my tumour and me.

A Girl, A Guy, And A Tumour

Good God Where Did The Time Go?

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 4

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 3

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge - Day 2

30 Day Infertility Blog Challenge

Poka Dots and Doctors

I Remeber What I was Doing 10 Years Ago Today!

So in between recovery and moving, the Hun and I are celebrating our 10 Wedding Anniversary to day! So Happy 10th Hun, and remember to lift with you legs as you are moving those boxes! Here is to many more. I love you Attila!

What I have been Up to This Past Week

one month

First post

2 days

3 1/2 more days

Bumped to Friday May 13

8 days...

Endoscopic Pituitary Surgery

30 days or 720 hours whatever comes first

Let The Count Down Began

Still Waiting. 4 a Date

January-17-11, Blue Monday epescially if you are my kitten

2011 = Hope

Can't Stop

I Would Like To Offer You Surgery.

Finally News We Want To Hear.

In Less Than 24 Hours... Grey will Still Matter

Book: UnSung Lullabies

See You In September, Oops I should have said October.

October is Brain Tumour Awareness Month

See You In September

The Recap Of A Roadtrip

Wordless Wednesday - Our Reason For Our Road Trip.

A Midsummer Road Trip with Guilt and Worry

Wordless Wednesday - My New Enemy

And The Winner is... UPDATED

She Picked Door Number 1

The Card Simple Reads

Behind Door Number???

Wordless Wednesday - Rain Rain Go Away, Come Again in 4 days...

For Better, For Worst, For Richer, For Poor, In Sickness And In Health

Just Another Manic Monday

Going For the Golden Prize

Wordless Wednesday - Soon To Be 143 Years Old

My Sister From Another Mister Give Away

May's Prolactin Level

Review of Day 1 And a Product review

My New Diet Plan And This is Day 1

The Way To A Man’s Heart Is Through His Stomach

Doctors, Doctors and more Doctors

So While I Was Out The Docotor Called

I Called and I'm Happy That I Got To Leave A Voice Mail ( Beacuse I'm Chicken)

Tomorrow

How I spent my Mother’s Day

It Started Off Normal...

I'm so mad at myself, I could spit

Canada Post Finally delievered It and Thank you LIS

April's Blood Test Is In

April's Secert Pals

Just Waiting For The Doctor To Call

Move Over Magical Beans, there is a New Magical Veggie & This 1 Does Something Then Make You Toot

Sunday Sayings

Another Blood Test and Another Waiting List

Another Lump

Sunday Sayings & Maybe the End to my Break

My Break

1 Word

We've Fallen Into A Nice Routine

Sunday Sayings

Sunday Sayings

“A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life.”- 1670 J. Ray Irish Proverbs

To Metformin or not to Metformin?

Aprils Prolactin Level

3dw

Blood Tests, and Hate

The Events of Yesterday

GG is Sick

Our New Normal

Phone, Numbers and Filing

My Last Day as a Kept Woman

February's Prolactin Level